Cheery Bananas Online

The brother of Happy Mondays legend Sean Ryder spoke out today about his fears that he’ll be next in the crackdown on child sex offenders.
Following the recent arrests of Pete Townsend, Tam Paton and Matthew Kelly, terrified Wayne Ryder claims he has fallen under police suspicion simply because of his “unfortunate name”.
“I’m innocent, but the way the papers and the Tele have it these days, if you’re not an asylum seeking terrorist you’re bound to be a kiddie fiddler,” the petrified star-sibling told us.
“ I reckon he’s up to something,” neighbour Guts Larue commented.
“I mean alright, he looks like a normal bloke when you see him in the street but imagine him on the news, his face in slow motion with the colour draining from it ending on a freeze frame. I reckon that would make him look like evil incarnate.”

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